All You Need to Know About Relationship Counselling

Relationship counselling is no longer a taboo and, if you consider it awkward or unnecessary, you could choose to reconsider.

Relationships can be tricky, even with your lifelong neighbourhood friends not to mention romantic relationships. Relationships can be challenging. Even if the two of you mostly get along brilliantly, the stress in your daily lives can make even the simplest of conflicts seem insurmountable.

Stress in a romantic relationship can at times seem insurmountable.

There is a whole lot to gain from talking to a professional regarding your relationship.

Knowing the Signs

Not everybody needs relationship therapy; some couples get along well enough and manage to resolve their issues internally. However, this depends on both members of a relationship as individual people, as well as various outside influences.

The fact that you’re considering relationship therapy is a tell-tale sign that perhaps you could give it a go.

It is often true that the earlier you seek counselling, the better.

  • If you’re experiencing issues expressing your feelings to each other, you could consider relationship counselling
  • If contempt, withdrawal, or criticism become frequent visitors to your interactions as a couple, seeing a professional might be warranted
  • If there’s a seemingly unsolvable disagreement looming over the two of you, a relationship counsellor might help solve it. Not only that, but you might learn how to surmount other differences that arise in the future
  • If there was infidelity, abuse, or addiction involved, or a combination of all three, relationship counselling can help
  • If there was a stressful event that occurred in your lives (related or unrelated to your relationship), therapy can help
  • If the two of you are experiencing difficulty in making big decisions together, you might want to seek support from a relationship professional.

Giving attention to your communication skills, improving your overall happiness, and strengthening relationships are well-known potential benefits of couples’ therapy.

Premarital Counselling

If you are in a relationship and are getting ready to make a further commitment, relationship counselling can help you bridge any potential gaps and prepare you for what lies ahead. Strengthening your relationship before marriage can be of tremendous value in years to come.

Building a strong foundation is what makes a marriage loving, and affectionate. Which is precisely what premarital counselling focuses on – taking initial steps to strengthen the bond between the two of you before tying the knot.

Premarital counselling deals with various issues that may need addressing before marriage. Here are a few examples:

  • Different beliefs and values
  • Responsibilities and roles
  • Affection and sex
  • Communication
  • Parenting choices and beliefs
  • Family relationships
  • Finances
A couple at pre-marital counselling, preparing for their wedding

With premarital counselling, a realistic picture of expectations is established in couples therapy with the aim of getting the marriage off to a good start.

Online Relationship Counselling

Maybe the two of you are in a long-distance relationship or just too busy to take time to commute to a consulting room. Perhaps your work dictates that you’re often abroad. It could even be that you or your partner just aren’t that comfortable with traditional, face-to-face therapy and the online option seems more appealing.

Whatever the reason, online relationship counselling is a perfectly viable option. In this day and age, with quality web cameras, Zoom, Skype and strong internet connections, there are good reasons to consider online relationship counselling as a good alternative to face to face counselling.

Finding an Experienced Relationship Therapist

First of all, just because you’ve come across a professional who refers to themselves as a “marriage counsellor,” doesn’t mean that they won’t also help with other types of relationship issues.

But how do you find the right counsellor for you? Well, the obvious option would be Google, BACP, UKCP, the Counselling and other Directories. Search for a therapist with whom you feel you can connect with,  is the most appealing to you, read their therapeutic approach and so on.

Another way to find a therapist is by word of mouth. For relationship counselling, you could be on the lookout for references from others.

Curb Your Expectations

It’s important that you know what to expect. Don’t go in expecting immediate results after the first session.

The first few relationship counselling sessions will focus on your history as a couple, as well as on the problems that the two of you have had over the months / years you have been together. These will include any problems that you’ve managed to resolve with ease, and those that you’re still struggling with.

Remember also that your entire emotional and relational history is what has made you into the significant other you are to someone today.

Keep in mind that different therapists exercise different approaches and are from different schools of thought. This is characteristic to all branches of psychotherapy.

What You Can Do

Always remember that you’re investing time, emotions and you are paying for therapy. Dishonesty, avoidance of discomfort, not putting the time into it, and not listening will not help your issues. If you’re agreeing to couples’ therapy, make sure that you’re honest about it.

The Basics of Relationship Counselling

Whether you want to begin online relationship counselling or prefer to do it in person, you can rest assured that both methods are effective. It is important that you keep your mind open – don’t go into therapy thinking that it isn’t a good idea. Don’t forget, if your significant other feels they need relationship counselling, so do you.

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At Leone Centre, we offer online counselling as well as face to face at the Hurlingham Studios in Fulham, easily reachable from PutneyChelseaWimbledon and Victoria.

Whether you want to book an initial appointment or enquire with a free 10 minute consultation, contact us today.

Myers Briggs Personality Test – MBTI – London, UK and Worldwide

Own your Strengths & Weaknesses, Shift your Consciousness, Transform Yourself

“Until you make the unconscious conscious, it will direct your life and you will call it fate.” Carl Jung

It comes as a surprise to many, that we are conscious of an estimated 5 -10% of our cognitive activity. That makes 90 – 95% of our behaviour, thoughts, actions, desires, emotions and decisions driven by our unconscious….

That being said, expanding self-awareness brings freedom from unconscious fixed beliefs, recycled opinions, old habits and social and psychological conditioning. The result – space and energy for spontaneity, creativity and authenticity. Not to mention the ability to be fully in the present moment able to respond to each moment as it arises, as opposed to reacting. Understanding and becoming aware of your inherent personality type, traits and preferences in perception and judgement creates great potential to own and embrace them – strengths and weaknesses alike.

The Myers Briggs Type Indicator® (MBTI®) a personality inventory brings the fundamentals of Swiss Psychologist, Carl Jung’s’ theory of different psychological types into applicable form. The basis, in short – that human behaviour isn’t a random variation but is orderly and consistent based on a difference in the way individuals take preference in their perception and judgement. The psychometric questionnaire is designed to measure psychological preferences. Find out how you perceive the world and make decisions. Examine your newly established personality with a trained professional and understand what it means to you.

In a society full of external messages, a global network of constant information and social and cultural pressures it’s easy to lose touch with our authentic qualities, unique potential and ourselves. Think of a baby – no baby is afraid to expresses its gut feelings authentically. Think of a child – loving, curious, playful, joyous, creative and compassionate. These qualities are essential to being human yet by adulthood we have taken on a whole load of conditioned behaviours, reactions, labels, rules, insecurities, defences, beliefs and opinions which mask our natural state. These influences impact on our relationships with others and ourselves and can become a source of distress, stress, anxiety and dis-ease.

By bringing the unconscious into the conscious, you can start to make conscious decisions about how you want to go forth in to the world. Owning and consciously working with your personality preferences, strengths and weaknesses is a solid foundation into the journey of self-discovery to fulfil your unique potential.

By developing self-awareness and owning your personality traits (flaws and all) you can begin to reclaim your authenticity, to build your emotional and relational intelligence, creating openness, making space more satisfying and effective relationships with yourself and others so you can go into the world with confidence in who you are.

 You can find out more about Myers Briggs Type Indicator® (MBTI®) and personality types and preferences here as well as Leone Centre online services, individual counselling and couples counselling.

Get in touch, if you would like to speak to a professional about our counselling services.

Finding inner resilience through the COVID-19 lock down

There is no doubt that the current coronavirus pandemic has triggered a very real fear response, on a global scale. The panic and stress manifesting in society is clear to see whether it’s in the media or the supermarkets…

And understandably too – we have had to adapt very quickly to a very new normal in order to save lives. Lives are at risk, daily routines have been lost, we are losing our loved ones, we are losing our jobs…. So much uncertainty, fear and grief can cause a very human stress response.

Finding a new normal and ways to deal with the secondary impacts of coronavirus within the restrictions we are living within is a challenge that we all have to overcome. How we manage this is really important.

A good place to start is building your emotional resilience: enhancing your ability to respond to the various emotional, physical, economic and social implications of the coronavirus pandemic in healthy and productive way is important for the health and wellbeing of you, your family and on a wider societal and global collective scale.

At Leone Centre we offer individual counselling services, face to face and online. As well as therapy services we have also created a psycho-educational learning tool and a space for reflection to develop self-awareness and to equip participants with a good understanding of human stress response plus the biological, psychological and social factors that interplay with their own narratives when it comes to managing stress and overwhelm.

In short, it is a two-part online, face-to-face workshop with a registered counsellor psychotherapist to gain self-awareness, learning to manage and challenge conditioned responses to stress.

Having a solid foundation to withstand the hurricane of uncertainty that we find ourselves in, helps us to stay grounded amongst the storm. It is crucial that we build this resiliance so that we minimise the risk of creating stress-related responses and stress-related problems now, but also further down the line.

So yes – the facts remain true – there are lives that are at risk- this is serious. Yes – we are practising social distancing. But in big change lies great opportunity. How are you harnessing this change? What narratives are you telling yourself — are they helpful for you? Do they enhance your stress levels or reduce them?

If you are interested in learning more about our emotional resilience personal workshop or range of online counselling services, don’t hesitate to get in touch with us today. Call us on 0203 9301007 or email contact@leonecentre.com and we will be delighted to answers your questions

Five Ways To Cope With Coronavirus Anxiety

It is fair to say that the COVID-19 outbreak in an unprecedented phenomenon, so it is completely understandable that many people are feeling increased levels of anxiety and stress through this period.

Whether it be feeling concerned about the lockdown and restrictions brought in by the government, feeling unsure of how the crisis will affect your personal life and relationships, or worries about your health as well as your family and friends – there are many aspects of the new situation that could leave you feeling stressed or anxious.

Here we take a look at five ways that can help you cope with any anxiety or stress related to the coronavirus outbreak.

1. Focus on what you can control

The COVID-19 outbreak has put us in an unprecedented position, with businesses having to find new ways to work, and lockdown affecting every person across the country. This can leave us feeling that we cannot control our lives – and that loss of control can feel overwhelming, leading to anxiety and stress.

The key thing to note here is that you need to free yourself of worry about the things that you can’t control, and focus on what you can. 24/7 access to social media and online news means that many of us are switched on to the ongoing crisis all day. This can be extremely intense and has the potential to be very distressing. Establish what is a trigger for your feelings of anxiety and avoid those situations wherever possible.

2. Keep in contact

Given the virus is physically affecting many people both through physical isolation and from the perspective of the illness itself, it has left a significant number of people feeling lonely, anxious about their health, and worried about the future.

It is important, then, to ensure that you do not feel too lonely or isolated. If you would usually see loved ones, friends, and family, phone them instead, or use video calling for a face-to-face chat.

3. Exercise when possible

As a part of the terms of lockdown in the UK, individuals and people who live together are allowed to leave the home once a day to exercise. It is well worth taking advantage of this. Get out into the fresh air and exercise when it is possible to do so. It may be nothing more than a walk around the block, but it can be a great way to clear your head and connect with the outside world.

4. Eat healthily

Maintaining a healthy diet is an important way to reduce anxiety and stress. The fact that restaurants are closed for dining in means that you will be doing a lot more of your own cooking. Focus on healthy options with plenty of fresh fruit and vegetables.

5. Online Counselling could help you

If you are currently self-isolating or under quarantine – or simply would prefer not to leave your home due to the medical situation – it could be the case that online counselling services would be a good option. This allows you to get any counselling services you require and help with your mental health, without worrying that you are breaking lockdown and social distancing rules.

Technological advances mean that it is now possible for trained counsellors to provide you with confidential and private spaces to talk through any anxieties and issues you are having that revolve around the COVID-19 crisis.

If you are interested in learning more about our range of online counselling services, don’t hesitate to get in touch with us today. Call us on 020 3930 1007 or email contact@leonecentre.com and we will get back to you as soon as possible.