Gender Questioning


What is Gender Questioning?

Gender questioning is a term used to describe the process of exploring and questioning one’s gender identity. It can involve taking a closer look at the traditional binary gender categories of male and female and considering whether these fit with one’s own experience of gender.

People who are questioning their gender may feel unsure, confused, or uncomfortable about their gender identity. It’s essential to create a safe and welcoming environment for those questioning their gender; this can help to feel confident in exploring gender identity. 

Gender questioning is a normal and natural part of the process of self-discovery and self-exploration. It is common for individuals to question their gender identity at some point throughout their lives. This process may involve exploring and challenging traditional gender norms and expectations and considering the possibility that one’s gender identity may not fit within the binary categories of male or female. By examining their gender identity, individuals are able to understand themselves better and live more authentic and fulfilling lives.

At the Leone Centre, we understand the difficulties of questioning one’s gender and how it can impact one’s life. If you’re going through a challenging and confusing time, know that our therapists are here to support you.

How can Gender be Expressed?

Gender expression is a personal and individual choice, and there are many ways that people can express their gender in a way that feels natural to them.

Gender can be expressed in various ways, including:

  • Clothing and fashion choices
  • Hairstyles and grooming
  • Body language and mannerisms
  • Name and pronouns – “he/him,” “she/her,” “they/them”
  • Hobbies and interests
  • Relationships and social interactions, including their romantic and platonic relationships

Exploring Your Gender Identity

If you are questioning your gender, it can be helpful to take some time to explore your thoughts and feelings. Remember, resources and support are available for you, and you are not alone in this experience.

It may be useful to educate yourself about gender identity and expression and seek out people or groups that can provide the understanding and a safe space for exploration. It’s also okay to experiment with different expressions of gender, whether it’s through clothing, hairstyles, or other means. Take your time and move at your own pace, and remember to be patient and kind to yourself throughout the process.

It’s important to understand that gender is a spectrum, and there is no one “right” way to express your gender identity. What matters most is finding what feels authentic to you. So, focus on your well-being and happiness, and know there is no pressure to fit into a specific box or category.

How to Support a Gender-Questioning Young Person

If you have a young person in your life who is questioning their gender identity, it’s important to provide them with support and understanding. Some ways you can support a gender-questioning young person include:

  1. Listen: Be open and attentive when young people want to discuss their thoughts and feelings about their gender identity. Let them know that you are there to listen and support them.
  2. Educate yourself:  Spend some time learning more about gender identity and expression and become familiar with the language and terminology used to discuss these topics. This will help you better understand the young person’s experiences and provide more meaningful support.
  3. Use their preferred name and pronouns: Using the young person’s preferred name and pronouns can go a long way in validating their gender identity and showing that you respect and support them.
  4. Create a safe and supportive environment: Ensure the young person feels safe and supported in your home or other shared spaces. This may involve having conversations with other family members or friends to ensure they also use the young person’s preferred name and pronouns.
  5. Encourage self-expression: Encourage young people to express themselves in a way that feels true to them, whether through clothing, hairstyles, or other means. Let them know that it’s okay to explore and experiment with their gender identity.
  6. Seek resources and support: Connect young people with support groups for gender-questioning youth. Consider seeking the guidance of a therapist.

Remember, supporting a gender-questioning young person requires patience, empathy, and an open mind. Show them that you love and support them and that you are committed to helping them explore and express their gender identity safely and meaningfully.

The Intersection of Gender Questioning and Mental Health

Gender questioning can impact an individual’s mental health and well-being in various ways, as it can be a challenging and emotional process. Some mental health issues that can be affected by gender questioning include:

  1. Anxiety: Feelings of uncertainty and confusion about one’s gender identity can lead to anxiety and worry about the future.
  2. Depression: Gender questioning can also lead to feelings of sadness, hopelessness, and loss, particularly if an individual is struggling to come to terms with their gender identity.
  3. Self-esteem issues: Questioning one’s gender identity can impact an individual’s self-esteem and self-worth, particularly if they feel that their gender identity is not accepted or valued by society.
  4. Social isolation: Some individuals who are questioning their gender may feel isolated and unsupported, particularly if they are not able to find a community of individuals who share similar experiences.
  5. Family and relationship issues: Questioning one’s gender identity can also impact family dynamics and relationships, mainly if family members do not understand or accept the individual’s gender identity.

It’s essential to prioritise mental health and seek support if you are experiencing any of these issues. Speaking with a therapist who specialises in gender identity can be a helpful step in addressing mental health issues that could arise during the process of questioning one’s gender.

Therapy for Gender Questioning: Benefits, Considerations, and Support

Gender questioning can be a complex and emotional process, and seeking therapy can be a helpful way to support your well-being and mental health during this time. Therapy at Leone Centre can provide a safe and supportive space for individuals who are questioning their gender to explore their thoughts and feelings and to receive guidance and support as they navigate their gender identity.

Couples and family therapy offer a supportive environment for individuals and their loved ones to explore the complexities of gender identity. As individuals embark on this deeply personal journey, therapy provides a safe space for open dialogue, fostering understanding and empathy among family members and partners. Through this collaborative process, couples and families can build stronger connections, learn to appreciate each other’s unique experiences, and create a nurturing atmosphere that embraces the diverse tapestry of gender identity, ultimately fostering a more authentic and harmonious life for everyone involved.

Therapy can also help you to build resilience, as exploring your gender identity can sometimes bring up difficult emotions and challenges.

That being said, the decision to seek therapy is a personal one, and there is not a one-size-fits-all answer. Remember, it’s important to prioritise your well-being and happiness as you navigate the process of questioning your gender.

Talk with a Leone Centre Professional

If you do feel like you need some help and support, our Therapists are available 7 days a week. Call us on 020 3930 1007. We can also provide fast track therapy.

We can offer in-person counselling in London appointments at our head office in Fulham and our offices in Kensington, Wimbledon and Belgravia, We also service Victoria, Putney, Chelsea, Knightsbridge, Mayfair, and City of London.

In addition, we offer Online Therapy appointments wherever in the world you are located, should this better fit around your existing commitments or if you are not able to attend an in-person appointment.

Schedule Your Leone Centre Appointment