For the growing community of expats in Japan, the experience is often both rich and challenging, and it’s important to recognise that neither experience undermines or negates the other. Japan is renowned for its efficient public services, high levels of safety, beautiful clean spaces and delicious cuisine.
These aspects undoubtedly contribute to a high quality of life. Nevertheless, for English-speaking expatriates and their partners and families, living thousands of miles away from support networks and familiar environments can exacerbate existing issues and bring up new ones.
Although many experiences specific to the expat experience can impact emotional well-being, expats are often affected by the same challenges as those who have not moved abroad.
Issues and concerns in romantic and familial relationships, emotional well-being, sex life and finding access to specific types of support, such as LGBTQIA+ and neurodivergent-affirmative assistance, can make any experience more challenging. However, living abroad can make addressing these issues more complex. Some examples include:
- Communication and resolution in relationships – such as deciding whether to move abroad together, shift to a long-distance relationship style or end the relationship.
- Adapting to new workplace cultures – new relationships, creating new professional networks
- Imbalances in relationships – if one partner moves abroad with their partner, they may depend on the partner to meet more of their emotional needs than before.
- Loss of identity and purpose – if one partner leaves their job and support network to live with their partner overseas, they may find it difficult to reestablish themselves.
- Family relationships—If family members are going through a transitional stage, particularly adolescence, they may blame their parents and the move for the instability or unhappiness they are experiencing. This can lead to issues with school and behaviour.
- Wanting different things – one partner may wish to move home with the children or stay abroad, opposing the other.
- Infidelity and insecurity – if only one partner moves abroad, one or both partners may find the distance and change in the relationship creates space for other meaningful attachments or may be worried about the other partner being unfaithful.
- Loss and painful experiences – without the usual support network, expats and their partners can find bereavement, relationships ending, job losses and other experiences of grief more difficult.
Big life changes can require a period of adjustment, and during this time, it’s very common to feel uncertain, lonely, or regretful. This is where therapy can play a vital role. Engaging with a professional who understands the unique challenges of expat life can provide valuable support, helping individuals through the emotional and relational aspects of living abroad.
About the Expat Experience in Japan
Different experiences will resonate with each expat based on their unique circumstances. However, it is common for individuals who have moved abroad to encounter emotional challenges, especially feelings of isolation and stress, during and after the adjustment period.
Living abroad can present a distinct set of challenges that are often shared by expats worldwide. These challenges, as well as the above list, can include:
- Language barriers
- Cultural adjustment
- Time zone differences
- Out of comfort zone
- Feelings of loneliness and disconnection
- Challenges in making friends
- Questioning decisions
- Lack of support network
- Homesickness
- Isolation
- Concerns for loved ones back home
- Difficulty in seeking support
- Long-distance relationships
Moving to a new country with new cultural norms can also prompt reflections on one’s identity and lead to shifts in beliefs and values.
Moving abroad for work can also introduce some specific challenges, including adapting to new workplace cultures and difficulties creating new professional networks.
Expatriates who move to Japan also encounter some experiences specific to the country. Some aspects of Japanese culture which differ from UK culture include:
- Cultural etiquette – for example, around greetings, relational and social norms
- Work-life balance – in Japan, it is common to work long hours, including overtime
- Bureaucracy – it is common for legal and logistical issues to take longer to resolve, particularly for non-Japanese residents
- Cultural differences – especially regarding gender roles and LGBTQIA+ rights
Understanding and addressing these experiences is crucial in supporting the well-being of expats. Therapy can offer a safe space to explore these feelings, find coping strategies, and ultimately thrive in a new environment. Expat therapy offers a valuable support system to help people navigate these changes and adapt to their new environment.
Family and Relationship Dynamics in Expat Life
The expatriate experience significantly affects not only those who move but also their partners and families. Whether the partner or family moves or stays in their country of residence, the transition can profoundly impact relationship dynamics.
Even after addressing the logistical aspects, the emotional and psychological impact of moving abroad can be significant. Expat children and partners often face challenges such as leaving their communities, jobs, schools, and social groups and forming entirely new support networks. This process can be stressful, especially if they do not speak the language or have any connections in their new location.
Alternatively, in some cases, the family or partner will not move abroad with the expat, and these relationships must be maintained from a long distance whilst also adapting to their new environment. Meanwhile, the family or partner who remains at home must also then maintain this relationship whilst adjusting to the new forms and frequency of contact.
In both scenarios, expatriate therapy can be invaluable. Secure, online expat therapy offers the flexibility to allow partners and family members to join from different locations, providing real-time therapeutic support. Expat family and relationship therapy can enhance communication and strengthen family cohesion, helping all members navigate the challenges of living apart or adjusting to a new environment.
It is also common to experience changes in outlook towards relationships and sex following a big life change, and moving abroad is no different. Loneliness, culture shock and a sense of instability can lead to seeking comfort or risks, and this can impact sexual and romantic relationships.
Psychosexual expat therapy, also known as sex therapy for expats, can be incredibly beneficial for helping to resolve issues around sex when living abroad.
How Therapy Can Help Expats in Japan
Therapy can be vital during and after relocating to a new country. The stressors associated with such a significant life change can stir up deep-seated insecurities and beliefs and introduce new pressures and issues to resolve.
Counselling with an experienced integrative therapist provides expats with a secure, confidential space to explore these issues, helping them improve their quality of life and emotional and mental health.
Counselling can assist expatriates in better managing stress, anxiety, loneliness, and the shifts in a relationship and job dynamics that often accompany a move. It also helps address any issues that may occur within relationships when one or both partners move and maintain healthy bonds.
Therapy can be very helpful for families in adjusting to the changes that occur when one or all members relocate abroad. Expats can better sustain their emotional and relational health by intentionally focusing on nurturing relationships with others and with themselves.
Leone Centre is expanding its therapy and consultancy services into Japan and invites organisations in the area to discuss collaborations further with our services. We offer Employee Assistance Programme (EAP) services and flexible online counselling provided by highly experienced, culturally sensitive therapists.
Leone Centre therapists currently work with individuals and couples from European expat communities, Bangkok in Thailand, South Africa, Tokyo in Japan, Singapore, Dubai, Abu Dhabi, Saudi Arabia, Hong Kong, Shanghai in China, Kuala Lumpur in Malaysia, and Seoul in South Korea. Our aim is to enhance expatriates’ mental and relational health as they navigate the exciting yet challenging experience of relocating abroad.
- About the Author
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Co-founder and director of Leone Centre, 20+ years of experience supporting people, and offering valuable knowledge through Couples Counselling and Individual Counselling. Before becoming a therapist, I worked in the financial sector.
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